While penetration of technology in our lives has made communication an easy deal, with that comes the consequence of interacting with people from behind a screen. Emojis, reels, like, reactions etc., can never be a replacement for human touch, smile, eye contact or a hug. If earlier we looked for signs of interest through a person’s body language, today we hide behind our screens and try to decipher the meaning behind our crush’s reaction to our Instagram story. Earlier, one had to write a love letter and ensure it reached the special person safely. Today with a few effortless clicks, the ding of the notification delivers your messages within a second. But regardless of the mode or ease of communication, we find it hard to confess our feelings to someone. While some are comfortable doing this, there is a fair share of people who are not, and have you wondered why?
Vulnerability
A man is most vulnerable when they open up and share their feelings/emotions with someone. It is equivalent to giving power to the other person to decide your fate, and the associated uncertainty can be quite hard to handle. Sometimes we even think our self-respect is at risk by confessing our feeling first. We ought to understand that feeling all of the above is normal. But if you truly have feelings for someone, isn’t it better to be vulnerable once rather than carry a lifelong regret? Also, having the courage to be honest about your feelings does not undermine your self-respect. Rather, it enhances your emotional resilience.
Must Read: Things Some Men Feel Insecure About While In A Relationship
Fear of rejection
Fear of rejection is a major factor that keeps people from confessing their feelings. Getting rejected by someone you love can be quite an ordeal. We have all heard stories of people scarred for a lifetime because of such rejections. However nonchalant you act, rejection surely can be a painful experience if your feelings are genuine.
Rejections are part and parcel of life; they have no connection with how you are. People have their likes/dislikes, and they have every right to decide for themselves if you are the right person for them. Rejection need not be considered an ego issue; we should learn to accept and move on gracefully. Once the ‘Devdas’ phase eases out, you can be happy that you no longer have to live with uncertainty.
Check out: Why Do Some Women Fall For Toxic Relationships?
Insecurity
If we are insecure about certain personal aspects such as physical appearance, personality, job, family background etc., this can also be a hurdle when confessing feelings. The first step to overcoming insecurity is to accept ourselves for who we are; this builds self-confidence in us. Stop telling sentences similar to – “If only I looked more beautiful/handsome, he/she might have accepted me.” This is not true. For someone, you might look plain, but for someone else, you will be beautiful. What is more important is to be comfortable with yourself, then you can easily find the confidence to be honest about your feelings.
Fear of change
A common notion is that once you confess your feelings and the other party does not reciprocate them, then the relationship that you both shared would be affected. Well, maybe or maybe not. Every relationship is unique, just like how every person is different. The dynamics of certain relationships might fluster, but some might become stronger. This fear is quite a genuine concern because one cannot predict the outcomes and after-effects of the confession. But how long will you hide your feelings because of this fear?
Also Read: Live-in Relationship: What You Will Learn From It
Fear of judgement
Humans are social animals, and we value the image we hold in front of people. It is not always easy to remove the mask, be vulnerable, and face judgement/criticism. The concern over what the other person would think about you often keeps you from confessing. Also, what if you face criticism from the person you like, it is a far worse scenario.
While it could be a very hurtful situation, on a positive note, it should also act as an eye-opener for you. A person who judges/criticises you because of your feelings is not a person worth giving a chance to.
When feelings are genuine, fear is natural. Bottling up feelings might not be the solution for all. But at the same time, it is important to accept and respect the opposite party’s decisions too. Keeping an open mind and not letting our ego be hurt is the perfect way to confess our feelings.
